A question that we are often presented with is “Why do homeless people have dogs?” This case study tells us exactly why..
As humans beings we like to be social which is a good thing as we also need to be social. At a fundamental level if we are to exist as individuals we must interact with other people. Everyone’s identity is socially created from our relationships with others whether as parents, friends, colleagues and neighbours etc. We all know the saying ‘no man is an island’.
As social beings we benefit from and yearn for contact. We want to have friends and to meet like-minded people. We want to be recognised and invited in, to participate in life, to be part of something bigger. To be taken care of. So when life goes wrong as it so often does, we can fall back on our circle of relationships, friends, family, community and find comfort and strength in our struggles. As humans we find enjoyment in others and crave companionship. As Mark Twain once said “To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with”.
However today in Britain 1 in every 10 people would describe themselves as lonely and without having a single person they could turn to. Loneliness has a variety of causes and affects people differently. Often people feel lonely because of their personal circumstances but sometimes loneliness is a deeper, more constant feeling that comes from within. Many homeless people are caught in such a double bind, the loneliness of living on the streets, and the deeply personal reasons which led to them to becoming homeless.
Homeless people can feel lonely because of the discrimination and marginalisation they experience on a daily basis. They can be judged, persecuted, dismissed and forgotten about. Out of sight out of mind. At the same time they can be dealing with profound psychological problems such as childhood abuse, addiction, and mental ill health. As individuals they can struggle to like themselves or to believe that they are likeable at all. They may lack self-confidence or have a fear of being hurt. They may feel that they are worthless and not worthy of any consideration. All of which leads to further isolation and the exacerbation of their loneliness. Ironically as people experience a lack of social interaction and companionship, they become even less able to have any social interaction and so the vicious circle continues of anxiety and depression, isolation and loneliness. When people are denied social interaction and companionship, no matter what the cause, they suffer terribly and feel trapped. So how do homeless people overcome their loneliness and find companionship? Some homeless people chose to have a dog.
Recently I accompanied T to her hospital appointment for an exploratory medical procedure. She was anxious that her little dog Trampy should accompany her so that he could calm her chronic nerves simply by his presence and to welcome her when she woke up. She explained “He makes me feel safe and loved, he is connected to me. He calms me when I’m having my panic attacks and I know he understands me. He is not like a dog he is like a little person. He is protective of me and brings happiness to my world. With him I don’t feel as lonely”. Without him T felt that she wouldn’t be able to carry on but with him she felt she could face another day.
So what is it about the relationship between an owner and their pet that is so strong and durable? How can someone who is socially and emotionally compromised sustain such a relationship? In many ways the relationship between a human and a dog is so much simpler and accessible than between two people. In effect, I believe that Trampy demonstrates all the qualities required to be an effective support worker by walking with T by her side through her ups and downs.
T has treated Trampy compassionately, providing him with love, food and shelter, and in return he has given her total devotion and commitment. Trampy lives in the here and now and doesn’t relate on a verbal level but on a more instinctive emotional level. He provides her with a source of positive, non-verbal conversation. He does not have his own agenda, but is simply uncomplicated in offering unconditional loyalty and love. He meets T’s need for companionship and the basic human need for touch. Above all he does not judge her. By taking responsibility for Trampy T is distracted temporarily from her personal problems and is able to build her self-confidence and reduce her anxiety. He gives purpose to her daily life and represents a bridge between her and other people, providing the chance for social interaction with others.
As I sat with Trampy who is a cross between a Jack Russell and a Yorkshire Terrier, I realised that although he was only small, what he lacked in stature he more than made up for with his absolute loyalty to T. Trampy has the heart of a lion and would do anything to protect her. T had told me that she had saved Trampy from being deliberately drowned when he was a puppy but for me it was clear that Trampy through his enduring loyalty and commitment had also saved T from drowning, in a sea of loneliness and isolation from society simply by being there. In so many ways dogs teach us the basic fundamentals of social interaction and the joys of a loving relationship which protects all of us from the pain of loneliness. So maybe we could all learn a trick or two from Trampy and other dogs, truly our best friends.